How I went from PAIN to PURPOSE




If you’ve been to hell and back in your life (and let’s face it if you’ve been drawn to me and my message you probably have been) then you’ll know there can be a lot of healing to do.


However, if you’re not careful you can get stuck in all the healing and processing and before you know it you’re in danger of slipping into victimhood territory.


The sad thing about that is you miss the GOLD that those challenges are destined to alchemically transform into given the right conditions.


That GOLD is your true purpose.


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Your true purpose is woven into your deepest wound.


So for me my greatest challenge was living through and integrating a transformational crisis/breakdown/sudden awakening following the death of my mother. This sits within a bigger theme of loss and trauma that runs through my life.


If all the loss and trauma is there to break open my heart and awaken me spiritually then OK, I have sort of got a handle on that. But it was my inability to find clear answers or relevant support during my trauma-induced awakening that really left me alone and struggling at times. And so, helping others understand their transformational crisis and to shift from pain to purpose has become central to my own purposeful work.


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The lack of support available to me led me to intense spiritual inquiry, research and study, which eventually saw me helping other people going through similar experiences. In the process of healing myself and trying to make sense of what I’d been through I ended up helping others. Somehow I was synchronistically led to different teachers, teachings and therapies and I sort of cobbled together my own recovery and integration programme.


Then one day another wound catapulted my path to another level.


A dear client died as a result of her awakening/transformational crisis being misdiagnosed and mistreated in a UK hospital. And that was it. That deep loss ignited a fiery passion in me to make sure that awakening souls get the support they need so the world doesn’t lose a generation of potential teachers, artists, leaders and change-agents. In particular I was invited to get involved with charities and organisations (working alongside psychiatrists and mental health workers) seeking to change the mental health system so they can recognise spiritual awakening and transformational crisis instead of diagnosing it as an illness and medicating it.


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As a result I’m now working on the development of the International Spiritual Emergence Network which is bringing together existing spiritual emergence charities from all over the world who are joining together to make this life-saving and potentially world-changing shift.


So you see, each step deeper into my purpose has been triggered by something initially very painful.


Yes on a daily basis I listen to my heart and follow that surge of joy or expansion to choose my next steps but the big picture stuff was borne out of mess, loss and pain.


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So my questions to you my friend are this:


What is your deepest wound in this lifetime?

Is there a recurring theme?

Is there a fire in your belly connected to that theme?



Take time to answer those questions. Try free-writing in your journal about them. Breathe into any feelings that rise (and they will).


THAT is the key to your purposeful work.


If you are going to finally step up and stop doing work that makes you miserable and choose to work for yourself (you can do it), it had better be doing something you have passion and energy for because it’s not an easy path (you can still do it). Your fire and passion is what will get you through and keep you going no matter what.


So friends, it’s time to be your own alchemist and turn your pain into purpose. Time to turn your life into GOLD.


What is the message at the heart of your own mess? What is the passion and purpose woven into your deepest pain?


Please feel free to share your answers in the comments below.


Until next time.


Lots of love,
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3 thoughts on “How I went from PAIN to PURPOSE”

  1. Hi Kimberley
    I have just found your site and it’s wonderful! This post answered my question when I wasn’t even looking. I’m not in a hot mess now but was two years ago. I made huge changes and know what road I’m on now. I look forward to reading more of your wise words. I’m an artist too but whenever I had an exhibition it always felt like something was missing. That ‘something ‘ was other people so I created exhibitions for large groups of women artists to start with and from there it’s grown into my new creative pursuit; helping women my age with abandonment history through creative communication. So pleased I’ve found you! Do you have a newsletter?

  2. This means a lot to me .. I’m still coming out of the array of experiences and longing to move forward share and help others but my own personal closest relationships just don’t seem to work – even though I love my partner dearly he is pushing me away and does not want me again fuelling the constant lonlyness and abandonment I have felt all my life like a deep ache and wound .. I do feel positive yet quickly become devestated .. Learning to not let others dictate how I feel yet I’m longing for love and support .. Thanks for you’re blog this inspires me to unravel the spaghetti of my life xx

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