I was terrified. My gut was in knots. A friend had pushed me off the ledge and suggested I rent a room at a doctor-run complimentary clinic in town. But how could I? I knew my dream was to work for myself in some way that would heal and empower women but I wasn’t ready.
Or was I?
I’d been working in a spiritual bookshop downstairs from the clinic and was just getting settled having moved hundreds of miles back to my home county of Devon in the UK. I was integrating my spiritual crisis and my Mum and Nan had both died quite recently and I’d had to move in with my partner and his parents. I wasn’t feeling like a victim but it was a lot to handle. Give me a chance universe!
Was this the right time?
Did it feel right?
What if I didn’t get any clients?
I couldn’t afford to rent a clinic room and not fill it with clients.
What would I offer?
What would I call my work?
I didn’t know anything about tax or accounts or how to set up a business. Surely it would be complicated and I’d need a loan from the bank and a business plan?
What about practitioner insurance and professional memberships?
What if I couldn’t do it?
What if I failed?
AAAAAHH!!!! It was too scary!
Can YOU relate to this so far my lovely? Have you had life nudge you? Did you have all those same fears come up? Maybe they are coming up for you now?
My friend ran the clinic you see. So she suggested I don’t commit to monthly room rental and instead rent a room on an ad-hoc basis for an hour at a time. She knew about my training in Reiki and transformational breathwork and she knew I was spiritually open and intuitive. She also knew how bloomin terrified I was and so she encouraged me.
“Just put a poster up in the book shop and maybe a couple around town and see what happens”
Trust the process Kimberley.
So I went home and rustled up some basic posters on my computer with my mobile number on them and put them up around town. I felt so vulnerable putting myself out there and wondered what people would think. I wasn’t feeling confident at all.
All sorts of things started to bubble up. The minute I stuck my head over the parapet and came out of hiding, all sorts of fears and old programming came to the surface….
Maybe they’d think I was too big for my boots (that came from my Mum’s side of the family).
Maybe they’d think I was trying to be clever to make others look silly (that one came from my Father)
Surely I wasn’t good enough. This was what other people did. Not me.
Who was I to think I could do this and succeed at anything?
Was it just my ego puffing itself up?
What if I got attacked and ridiculed for revealing my intuitive gifts and lineage?
What if friends and family changed how they saw me?
Has this happened for you? Whenever you step up or do some self-healing or begin a new self-care practice or make a big leap, do you have all the old energy and programming come to the surface? How do you deal with it?
I just breathed through all the feelings that came up and then wrote myself a load of affirmations to counter them all. Sooo much old crap was coming up that I instantly realised I was going to have to make my inner work and self-care the top priority if I was going to be in a fit state to work with clients!
Then one day I had my first call. I can’t remember how soon it came but it was only a couple of days. I had my first client. SHIIITTT!!
I was so frightened and felt so out of my depth. My head wanted to jump in and try to overcompensate by over-analysing everything and trying to make everything absolutely perfect. I wrote a ton of notes and created all sorts of forms and hand-outs. I used a colleague’s client form as my template and was totally winging it.
Then came that first knock on the clinic door.*Gulp*.
Suddenly I was so overcome I just surrendered. It really was a F*!K IT moment. I just let go.
I can’t even remember what happened in the session. I used my Reiki training as the structure for the session and the rest was just intuitively guided. The client loved it! It went really well and she went on to become a regular client for years!
Pretty soon word got around and I was needing to rent more hours until I was renting so many hours I may as well have signed a contract with the clinic to pay a monthly rental. So that’s what I did. That was the next step. One of my fellow therapists said: “If you can fill a healing practice in this town you can do it anywhere!” which was very encouraging.
And so my path into my own soul-centered, intuitive business began.
Yes I had a load of experience working at various levels over 20 years in other people’s businesses but I didn’t have any magical marketing and strategy training and I didn’t have a business plan or even a clear vision of where I was going. I just took that first step and everything followed on from that. Having someone who saw my potential, who knew what I wanted, who understood my fears but didn’t let them win, THAT is what got me started. I couldn’t have done it on my own at that point.
Like many of you I’m highly sensitive and empathic and feel everything deeply, including fear. And so any time I have really moved forwards on my path, in my life and in my business it has been because of somehow having exactly the right person right there to believe in me and to encourage me. I give thanks to all of those angels in my life. They helped me face my fears and figure out how to take the next step, how to share my gifts and how to surf the river of my unfolding soul purpose.
None of us need to do this alone
None of us need to do this alone. We live on a planet of 7 billion+ people. Who came up with the belief that we’re supposed to do anything on our own! Without those angels I know I’d have sat at home or stayed in a going-nowhere job, confused, frustrated, wishing, wanting, waiting and watching others do what I knew I was here to do. Knowing me I would have stayed stuck in my comfort zone, hiding in that ‘spiritual closet’ and growing ever hopeless and resentful while trying to convince myself I was fine.
I have seen first hand the huge impact it had on me to have that sisterly support and encouragement and so I’m sure that’s why it gives me so much joy to pay it forward and to help YOU. Sisterhood means the world to me and it will change the world.
My soul-centered, intuitive business started with one person who believed in me. One person who would not let me ignore the call of my soul for one moment longer.
Just one person, one choice and one step can change your life.